


Memories

by moondancerfay



Category: GOT7, Markjin - Fandom, Markjinson - Fandom, Markson - Fandom, jinson - Fandom
Genre: 3rd Anniversary, Hyung-Line, Love, M/M, Memories, markjinson, mention of break-up, mention of threesome, only mentioning of Maknae-line, so sad I couldn't include much Yugyeom in this :/
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-25 08:41:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22493242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moondancerfay/pseuds/moondancerfay
Summary: Late night after the 3rd anniversary fan meeting some members lie awake, recalling memories of long past days…
Relationships: Mark Tuan/Jackson Wang, Park Jinyoung/Jackson Wang, Park Jinyoung/Mark Tuan
Kudos: 10





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> The Got7 hyungs recall past memories…

Mark sighed deeply, trying not to stir too much for Youngjae to wake up. He was thinking about what Jaebum said. “We are your family.” It was the truth, even though he wanted to see his biological family during the year more often, he knew very well that the boys became his brothers, his second family. He lets his mind wander and remembered how tough the trainee days were, how hard he had to work on his Korean, on martial arts tricking and so many more things. Thinking back made him teary again. He felt so alone during the first months and without ever telling anyone, he was close to giving up multiple times, but the guys around him, who worked as hard as he did, always encouraged him. Some of them debuted, some not, some changed the company, some dropped out to chase a different career. And in the end, it was the seven of them who got the chance to stay on stage together. He was envious of Jaebum and Jinyoung who were able to debut way before them, but he felt that it was just right since Jackson and him were far away from being ready. Jackson became his companion through the years, his stable rock who understood him in so many ways he didn’t even understand himself. Jinyoung became his teacher, his friend who never cared about if people understood him or not, he was tagged along for buying ice-cream, for watching a movie, for talking with the female trainees. The younger often complimented him on his looks which made the elder embarrassed, but Jinyoung always did it in a very decent way which Mark respected the most.

He felt like Jaebum didn’t know what to do with him because his Korean improved only slowly, even though he had classes every morning with other trainees like Bambam. He enjoyed the times when Jackson kept him busy that he didn’t have much time to think about his family and friends back in LA, where the weather was hot and the beach only a short walk away. Korea was foreign, the weather very cold in winter and too humid in summer when he fell easily sick because of the numerous air conditioners. He was a Californian boy who mainly grew up with burgers and Sunday football games. When he entered high school, he didn’t expect much from life, hadn’t thought about a future and when he got the chance to audition, he just thought ‘why not’ and nobody thought he would end up in a k-pop group far away from what he once called home. He grew up quickly, he had to. His quiet self sometimes standing in the way, but he was accepted and these days he even got offers to be MC, or participate in variety. Time will give him more confidence and since their fandom was growing, he was sure that they would year by year reach higher into the sky of success.

Whenever he thought back to their trainee days there was one memory which was his favorite and only thinking back to it made his chest fill with warmth and made his fingertips tingle in excitement.

It was a rainy night and they had just moved into a new dorm, only the four eldest of the group. There was enough room to give each space, but their management decided it would be better for them to already adapt to a shared room. Therefore, Mark and Jackson decided to stay in one room together. When they finally headed to bed after a hot shower and the lights were out, Jackson – for once – tried to talk to him about a more serious topic. He addressed the unofficial dating ban and that he felt lonely and craved some skinship. What Mark hadn’t expected was that Jackson climbed under his blanket and wrapped himself like a cat around the small frame of the LA native. 

While Mark wanted to sleep, Jackson’s breath was ghosting over the sensitive skin on his neck. The closeness wasn’t really uncomfortable the elder had to admit, but the younger lovingly stroked over his chest and Mark’s body started to react. He mumbled the younger’s name, which only was answered with a curious, questioning “Hyung?” and when Mark turned his head to face the younger, they were close as never before. The street lamps and the bright moon were the only sources of light in the room, but Mark could read so much in the dark puppy-like eyes.

The next thing that the elder remembered was Jackson’s soft lips on his. Warm and gentle, they moved, trying to encourage him to participate which he did after a moment of shutting down his serious thoughts and inner conflicts of how wrong this was. He never kissed a boy before and his experiences with girls were laughable at his age, but what he felt at that moment was like giving up his old self, admitting that he needed what Jackson was giving him this very moment – desperately.

Jackson’s kisses were incredible. Mark wondered about the younger’s experience. He applied sometimes more pressure, sometimes he let his tongue shyly glide along the elder’s lips. Kissing him was exciting and fresh. The further they went, the wetter and hotter their making out became.

Mark couldn’t think of any other boy he would have loved to give his first male kiss to. Jackson was gentle at first, became eager easily and demanding later on. They didn’t question their sexuality back then he thought. They were just two lonely boys in need for love and skinship which they gladly gave each other. Their friendship was still intact after it just became something more.

Later they agreed silently to keep this only between them, having each other as a safe haven, as a place they could turn to when the stress became too much, the training too exhausting and their homesickness too bad. Then the two of them would lie next to each other, caressing, stroking and fondling, trying to give each other a place to feel warm and welcomed, to feel loved and at home far away from their families. 

The elder enjoyed being around the younger, even though Jackson loved to complain – on and off camera – how quiet the American was, but nobody knew how vocal Mark could be when they were alone under the sheets.

It stayed like this for quite a while when the boys got to know each other, when the maknae line joined them, even during their first year as Got7. But, as time went by, Jackson became busier and their time together shorter and shorter. They still loved to fool around every now and then, but Mark understood that Jackson and Jinyoung grew closer and he would never have the same place in the younger’s heart as the Jinhae native had. Mark didn’t feel rejected, more the opposite, he felt happy for them two. Somehow they managed to love each other. So when Jackson wasn’t around and Mark felt too lonely he would sneak into Jinyoung’s room and sleep with him, curled into each other they gave warmth, felicity and content. 

There was no jealousy, just friendship and love which developed over many years. Jackson always gave them both what they needed and they tried to balance that out. Of course, since Mark and Jackson were foreigners, they had a special bond, but all of them grew together into this team that there was no space for envy or mistrust. They lived together and spent nearly every day with each other. Mark found his second family and it couldn’t be more perfect. He loved Jackson and his personality – every single day reminding them all that it is precious what they had and they needed to be thankful every minute of their lives. 

With this warm feelings and positive thoughts Mark fell asleep to Youngjae’s steady breathing.

***

Usually JB fell asleep very fast, but this night was different. Was it because of the full moon, was it because their fan meeting was so successful and he was still high on happiness? He smiled when he thought back to their ‘Let me’ part switch stage. The younger members did really well and Youngjae’s honest messages to the members warmed his heart. They worked so many years well with each other that he wondered if there would ever be a time when they had to go separate ways like their hyungs. They lived not together anymore; they had lots of solo activities, solo albums and many other things which kept them apart. He didn’t want to think about all this. He became so used to their dorm life and even though it was difficult, he became attached to all of the members. He grew up without siblings and was more or less a loner during his childhood with the exception of a neighborhood friend, but now he enjoyed having the members around. When he decided to b-boy he befriended many nice people that he still keeps in touch with. He never wanted to lose this connection to his former simple life, before becoming an idol.

He found comfort and advice in his sunbaes, composers and other creative staff members. Jaebum enjoyed working on songs, composing with his hyung’s and just sometimes hanging out together on the weekends if they were at the end of a promotion cycle. He never ever told one of his group members how his affection to one specific dancer and songwriter grew over all the years. This one person was older than him and when he became a trainee under JYP he spent every day in close proximity to him. When he signed the contract for JJP the CEO told him about a three year dating restriction, but when Got7 happened and another year passed, he and Jinyoung were free to get into a relationship and that’s what he did. While this man was his secret admirer in the past, he became his lover now and for one year they were together on tour since he was their background dancer for a while, but later on he stayed in Seoul for making music. Time flew by too quickly and as Jaebum became more popular, so did the pressure on their relationship which was kept a secret. The singer was abroad more and more and their time and intimacy faded. The schedules kept them apart and one day when they had for once an evening without obligations, Jaebum had to face the truth: his boyfriend of two years broke up with him because he got engaged and would marry soon. It was not only the broken trust, the infidelity and the hope of a happy ending in Korea’s society, it was the sudden feeling of emptiness inside that drove the younger nearly insane. There was no cure for his shattered heart. One day, he remembered well, Youngjae found the leader crying in their shared room and the younger wanted to help and understand him, but the burden he was carrying of his broken relationship was something he didn’t want to share. Not with his lovely, pure dongsaeng Youngjae, so he just kept quiet. Nevertheless, from this day on Youngjae was trying to cheer up the elder with words and simple things like leaving him his favorite snacks and finding always words of praise and admiration. The younger was a fox, it really helped the leader to get better, slowly but steadily and when they switched rooms, he realized how bad he missed the second lead vocal’s company. He caught himself staring at Youngjae during dance practice or when the other was busy playing video games. Jaebum became even more fond of the younger, smiling along when the other flashed his teeth, letting the other cuddle him or back-hug him when they were in private, just little things, but JB got used to this, enjoyed it way too much and even though he wasn’t as open about his sexuality as for example Jackson was, he guessed that Youngjae somehow felt his interest, but they never have spoken about it. They just grew closer. Jaebum sighed deeply before turning around in bed. His thoughts somehow always ended up with Choi Youngjae. Of course he was jealous of what the other three of the hyung line had. This poly amorous relationship that somehow left him out was special to all of them and he wasn’t the only one who stole glances at them when they happen to stumble across one of the pairings or all of them. It was Yugyeom, their maknae who then exchanged a gaze with the leader, having the same sadness within his eyes, speaking of wanting and imagination. The way their youngest looked at them spoke a thousand words without being said out loud, but they weren’t part of it and would never be. Who exactly Yugyeom was fond of he probably would never know. Jaebum saw how Jinyoung fell in love with the loud, cheerful Hong Kong native. He was the one to encourage the younger to stand to his feelings and just tell the only by a few months older how he felt. Jaebum saw how Jackson fell in love with the quiet, thoughtful other part of JJP and how they slowly grew closer which wasn’t that difficult since they shared the same birth year and he silently followed how they approached each other. Jackson was very affectionate and Jinyoung needed someone to lean on, therefore, it was only a matter of time until they came out to the rest of the members. Although they did not officially date until their dating ban allowed them to, Jinyoung always wanted them to be official within the group without the other’s knowing, so they kept it a secret and loved each other behind closed doors. For JB it was clear that all the members loved each other in a way that the “outside” couldn’t understand and couldn’t see. They shared their world with each other, their ups and downs, their living space, their dreams, their food and their clothes. Well, the clothes sharing was a topic of conflict. There were a few members who hated to share their clothes, others didn’t mind. Jinyoung was totally against underwear sharing and Bambam against shoe sharing, but somehow they managed well over the last years. There were a few items which were exchanged regularly, like Yugyeom’s belts, Youngjae’s black or Mark’s red hoodie and Jackson’s assorted cap collection. Although one hoodie was the hyung-lines favorite. It was simple, red and comfy. When they had a tiresome and exhausting schedule they needed to play rock, paper, and scissors to decide who of the four of them was allowed to wear it. This started already when the four of them moved in together and the clothes sharing started. These days were full of worries and stress, but they managed all well, even though they needed to learn every day to put trust into each other, build friendships and be patient and understanding – it was so difficult for the foreign members. Jaebum often worried too much when he couldn’t express what was on his heart and mind and he only talked to Jinyoung for many hours. Somehow, in between these thoughts the leader fell asleep, dreaming of their past time facing difficulties and a new world where everything was much easier being done and said.

***

This night Jackson didn’t feel restless. They could spend their time together on stage and with their fans, meeting them all for their anniversary. Many years passed since and a lot of memories kept flooding his mind.

During all their trainee time Jackson felt closest to Mark, who could understand him since they were both in a similar situation. Although, Mark’s parents were even farer away than his’. The Hong Kong native’s popularity rose quickly and the group’s friendship grew deeper over time. To a point where he needed to face-time or skpye with them on a daily basis when he was abroad on his solo schedule.

The first day he met the PD-nim and the trainees. He was worried about his non-existing Korean, but there were a few Chinese and English speaking people too, and he was told to never hesitate to ask something. He would not lie: his trainee days were long and hard, there was not much time for himself, not much time to think of his parents or friends back in Hong Kong. Trainees from all over the world took classes in vocal training, Hip Hop, English, Japanese, sex education, psychological counseling and so forth. Jackson was fine, he was a fencer and could cope with all the physical stress, but every now and then he felt lonely when they had a night off. The elder or braver ones asked out the female trainees, but he was too insecure and therefore, he kept Mark and sometimes Mark and Bambam company. When Mark was the quiet, serious one, Bam was the louder, cute one who was babied by everyone. Jackson liked to have Mark by his side. He was his calm anchor. He was his trustful companion for all of their time spent together. Even though Jinyoung stole his heart, Mark was always in a place no other could reach and when he and Jinyoung became more than just friends, Jackson did not leave his hyung out but asked him about his feelings and how he would like them to go on. That was just him: he wanted all people around him to be happy, safe and healthy. He didn’t like the period when Jaebum was depressed or when Bambam had a hard time with anti-fans. He somehow always felt responsible to keep them in a good mood and somehow he became misunderstood as someone who was always cheerful, which he wasn’t of course. Then there was Jinyoung. The one who caught him many times before falling into the pits of his angst and insecurities. The one who he would trust his life with no matter what. The love between them grew slowly, but deep. The dating restriction kept them from a more serious relationship, but now they became an official couple. At least within the group. Even in front of the staff members they kept their affections low and treated each other well just like best friends when they were on stage. Behind closed doors, they did not hold back in any way. Jackson knew that Markjin was a popular thing and he accepted the fans’ interests with a relaxed attitude since even though they were not as close as him and Jinyoung, they also liked each other in a more-than-friends kind of way. Sometimes Jackson wanted them to show him what is going on in their lives when he wasn’t around, when he was in China on his own schedule. Then they send him pictures of them cuddling with Coco in Jinyoung’s bed which he always deleted right away in case someone would hack his phone. Many other people would feel left out or jealous, but when he thought of his lovers he felt warm and happy. Right at the moment he wanted to walk into Jinyoung’s room and shower him with kisses, but he restrained himself. Jackson never slept in Jinyoung’s bed when the manager was in and they had an early schedule. This was a no-go and accepted by all three of them. Mark only spent the night in Jinyoung’s bed when Jackson and the manager were out – no exception.

Jackson sometimes felt sad when Mark kept his distance from them. Mark and him had a history and it pained him to see the elder didn’t enjoy it much when the three of them were together, even though they did share their bed when the other members were out. One day, Jackson could remember well, he asked the elder why he didn’t approach the two of them when he wanted or even needed to be with them. Mark was a rational person, he calmly explained to him that he was there when they needed him, but he didn’t want to disrupt their relationship. He was happy with each of them, but he didn’t like to stand in their relationship. Jackson got the point and accepted the older’s opinion. Therefore, they arranged most of the time that Mark was with Jinyoung when he was abroad and he was with Mark when Jinyoung had his individual schedule. They were often on the phone with each other and Jackson made sure to talk to his boyfriend every day when they were apart. He just loved to encourage Jinyoung and hear his laugh. He told him every day how much he loved him and that he will hit it big in the future. Sometimes, when they were too tired or too busy, they just sent each other a heart to say Goodnight. Jackson turned his face into the pillow to smile – totally in love. After such a long time, he still felt butterflies in his stomach when Jinyoung turned his shining eyes, crinkling at the side, towards him and he could capture the Korean’s beauty. Jinyoung was only a few months younger, so their friendship was easy from the beginning. The Korean tried to help the foreigners and Jackson could see how much Mark appreciated it. Jinyoung’s English improved, so did his Japanese and Jackson always admired him. Not the same admiration he had towards their ‘b-boy king’ leader who he looked up to though. When he missed his boyfriend when he was in China for longer, he always watched his acting in his dramas. Late at night, when he couldn’t fall asleep and he knew the members were already sleeping in Seoul, he felt better just seeing him on screen and with his voice in his ear he often fell asleep quickly. Even though his limbs felt heavy and warm, he still grabbed his phone and sent Jinyoung a little good night and love message. Jackson didn’t expect an answer since it was already so late, but a moment later his phone screen illuminated and Jinyoung sent an emoticon back. His smile widened and he held his phone close to his chest. ‘I love you so much’ was all he could think of when he closed his eyes, picturing Jinyoung in today’s boy scout uniform with his unbelievable beautiful eye-smile and his warm hand in his. He slowly drifted off to sleep. 

***

Jinyoung heard the maknae line talking next door while preparing for bed. Even though he was tired after the fan-meeting, he wanted to read at least a few pages of his new novel. When he lay down and opened his book, the bookmark fell out. Jinyoung instantly smiled as he remembered the night when Mark gifted it to him. They were alone in the dorm that evening, hanging out together, when suddenly Mark presented a small package to him, shyly smiling, his cheeks rosy. Jinyoung had an idea why the elder came with a present. The last months it became his new habit to nap with Coco on his bed. Sometimes it even happened that Coco was already gone and Mark was still sound asleep on his cover. The reason for all this was probably that Jackson has been away more often due to his Chinese variety shows and either Mark felt lonely himself without his best mate or he didn’t want him to feel lonely without his boyfriend, or he just appreciated Jinyoung’s single room that was a bit more secluded and quiet when others were in the dorm. Although, he didn’t mind at all and when he was really tired and needed his bed, he just cuddled Mark from the back and fell asleep around him. He adjusted well to sleeping around the American and his sometimes disturbed sleep now was deeper and more restful. That night of this present, they shared their first kiss. Mark was so soft and coy that the younger wondered how he was with Jackson. Jinyoung too liked it when it was slow and erotic and both of the tall, skinny males loved heavy petting. Their best kept secrets are their threesomes and Jinyoung’s blush gets even darker when thinking of the nights they spent all tangled up in each other. If he didn’t stop thinking about this now he risked a boner and he actually wanted to sleep soon, so he just sighed deeply and tried to focus on his book. 

Jinyoung was so happy that the three of them somehow managed to work well with one another despite him and Jackson’s relationship. Mark was there from the beginning – he had to admit he had a little crush on him during trainee days. The American is slim and athletic, has a deep, but also high pitched voice to die for and is more on the quiet side like him. They could spend time together without talking and they would understand each other without many words. Jinyoung was grateful that Jackson wasn’t the jealous type, because he had to admit, even though he loved Jackson with all his heart, there was a longing towards Mark and he felt complete and blessed to have them both on his side. Was he selfish? Definitely, but it worked and they arranged their time well together. The trail of his thoughts was interrupted by his phone buzzing. Jackson sent him a good night message. Jinyoung’s smile widened when he sent a little something back. How was this even possible, they saw each other every day, but still, he wanted to be with Jackson always. There was so much love between them that he wanted to hold the other and never ever let go again. During the time they kind of grew up next to each other, he developed an affection towards Jackson over all this difficult time spent together. Mark came with Jackson somehow and Jinyoung didn’t want to break this bond. When JJ Project finally happened, he was with Jaebum most of the time and when they moved into a new dorm, just the four oldest of them, it felt strange to him at first that Jackson and Mark would share a room, but he got used to it. He placed his book onto his stomach and rested his head on his hands, staring at the ceiling where he placed a few star stickers right after they moved in, then Jinyoung closed his eyes, recollecting his memories of his first kiss with Jackson. The Hong Kong native was always a little demanding, even though they also had romantic nights too with lots of foreplay and cuddling. Jackson was all he ever dreamed of with a personality that he always wished for in a partner: he was caring and soft, encouraging and supportive, attentive and patient, wild and sexy, rough and playful. They could make fun of each other one moment and another they could be overwhelmed by their hormones, ripping their clothes off to get it on, which already caused huge problems since the boys generally shared not only socks and simple pants, but also hoodies, T-shirts and dress shirts. Jinyoung – even though he was alone – blushed deeply when he remembered their first time. After the fourth time, he stopped counting how often they did it. They were on a break period at that time, otherwise they would have been in trouble because neither of them would have been able to dance or sing after this weekend. Their limbs and asses hurting, their backs scratched, their voices raw from moaning and screaming, all their energy spent. There was no holding back anymore, but sadly, since that day their intimate moments became less due to their constant promotions and abroad schedules, despite sharing a hotel room every now and then. From the beginning of their interest in each other they had to be careful. It was actually only Mark who knew about them from the very start. Although, Jaebum’s gaze on them also seemed to know more than they ever talked about. When Jinyoung confided in Jaebum, he was happy that the leader encouraged him to talk to the Chinese. The maknaes who joined them later in the dorm were excluded from all “hyung-line talks” when they were sitting together over a few bottles of Soju every now and then. During their first weeks living together it was Jinyoung who heard Mark and Jackson having sex regularly, which made him horny to the max and he had to help himself getting rid of this sexual frustration. His imagination ran wild with pictures of Jackson’s muscular back all sweaty over Mark’s lean, trained body. During this time he had to take cold showers at least twice a day. It was so different with Jaebum, he seemed to be in his own little world, enjoying more the company of their sunbaes and staff. Jinyoung knew the elder had more experience than him, but they never really talked about their past relationships and sexual incidents. He knew Jaebum well enough by now, but still there were things the other kept to himself - Jinyoung always had the impression that JB was deep inside a broken soul. Therefore, he kept all excessive skinship between Jackson and him and Mark and him behind closed doors. Whenever they had sex they made sure that nobody was around. Only then they could fully enjoy themselves. It was a dangerous game which they all played between themselves, but as long as they all were winning, they would stay together.

At the beginning of JJ Project Jinyoung still missed his parents and sisters a lot, but after becoming Got7 the boys grew closer like a second family and even when he was abroad he felt like having his family around. He was so comfortable with Mark and Jackson’s parents that he also called them ‘mom’ and ‘dad’. Since his English was quite good he enjoyed hanging out with Mark’s friends and family too. The initial shyness vanished after their second meeting and Jinyoung dreamed of taking Jackson and Mark with him to his hometown in the southeast of Korea. Over these entire thoughts, Jinyoung fell asleep, the book still on top of his blanket, the little bedside lamp next to him was still burning.

This night was full of memories for the four oldest members who shared so much over only a few years together. Love, friendship, their exhausting work, happiness and sorrows, walking together on their path of success and fame.

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic was written as a story gift for a hyung-line fanfic exchange a few years ago, but uploaded on another platform (which I don't have). I still love Jinson so much, so I felt like I have to share this with other Wang-gae Park-gae fans ^^


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